Parenting Isn’t Supposed to Feel This Hard
If you’re feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, or disconnected from your child, you’re not alone. You might be facing explosive meltdowns, constant power struggles, or a child who shuts you out completely. And no matter what you try—traditional discipline, reward charts, consequences—it’s just not working.
Here’s why: your child isn’t giving you a hard time, they’re having a hard time.
Behavior isn’t about "bad choices" or "not listening"—it’s a reflection of what’s happening in the nervous system. When kids feel dysregulated, unsafe, or overwhelmed, their behavior is their brain’s way of asking for help.
That’s where brain-based parent coaching comes in.
Why Traditional Parenting Strategies Fall Short
Most parenting advice is built around the idea that kids choose their behavior. But neuroscience tells us something different: behavior is driven by a child’s ability to stay regulated, connected, and safe.
- If your child is melting down over small things, it’s not because they’re trying to manipulate you—it’s because their nervous system is overwhelmed.
- If they refuse to listen, it’s not because they’re defiant—it’s because they feel disconnected and unsafe.
- If they lash out, shut down, or push you away, it’s not because they don’t care—it’s because their brain is in survival mode.
When we shift our focus from controlling behavior to understanding what’s driving it, everything changes.
What Is Brain-Based Parent Coaching?
I take a relational, neuroscience-backed approach to parenting that helps you:
- Regulate your child’s nervous system so they can feel safe enough to listen and learn.
- Build deep, meaningful connection so your child feels seen, understood, and secure.
- Create a home environment that fosters co-regulation and resilience—where peace replaces power struggles.
This isn’t about fixing your child—it’s about transforming your relationship so that behavior improves naturally.
Regulation: Why Co-Regulation Changes Everything
A dysregulated child cannot regulate on their own. They need a regulated adult to co-regulate with them first.
Think of it this way: your nervous system is the strongest force in the room. When your child is overwhelmed, they are looking to you to determine whether they’re safe. If you’re calm, they can borrow your regulation. If you’re anxious, frustrated, or upset, their nervous system picks up on that too.
In parent coaching, I’ll help you:
- Learn how to be the anchor in the storm, even when your child is losing control.
- Understand what’s happening in your child’s brain during meltdowns so you can respond effectively.
- Develop simple co-regulation tools that help your child move from chaos to calm without punishment or bribery.
When you become your child’s co-regulator, they begin to mirror your calm instead of your frustration.
Connection: The Key to Cooperation
When kids feel deeply connected, cooperation happens naturally. That’s because connection builds trust, and trust reduces the need for control, defiance, and power struggles.
In parent coaching, I’ll help you:
- Connect before you correct—because kids don’t learn when they feel disconnected.
- Understand your child’s nervous system state so you can respond to their needs instead of reacting to their behavior.
- Use play, laughter, and movement to build safety and engagement, which strengthens emotional resilience.
Connection doesn’t mean permissive parenting. It means leading with relationship, so your child feels safe enough to follow your guidance.
Felt Safety: Creating a Home Where Your Child Can Thrive
Your child’s behavior is directly linked to whether or not they feel safe. And I don’t just mean physical safety—I mean felt safety, the deep, internal sense that their world is predictable, nurturing, and secure.
A child who doesn’t feel safe will:
- Seem anxious, clingy, or overly controlling.
- Lash out in anger or shut down emotionally.
- Struggle with transitions, surprises, or new experiences.
I’ll help you:
- Recognize the hidden threats that might be making your child feel unsafe (even things you’d never expect).
- Create an environment of predictability and trust that calms their nervous system.
- Use body language, tone, and presence to send signals of safety—even when you’re setting limits.
When your child feels safe, their brain shifts from survival mode to learning mode—and that’s when real change happens.
Why I Do This Work
I’m Abby, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) with over 30 years of experience working with children and families. Through my online practice, Welcome Home Family Therapy, I specialize in helping parents navigate the challenges of raising complex and neurodiverse kids.
I’ve seen firsthand how hard parenting can be—especially when nothing seems to work. That’s why I integrate brain science, trauma-informed therapy, and attachment-based strategies into my coaching. My goal is to help you become the healer in your own home.
Let’s Work Together: Contact Abby
You don’t have to do this alone. Parent coaching can give you the tools, support, and confidence to handle even the toughest parenting moments.
I offer a free, one-hour phone consultation to see if we’re the right fit. No pressure, just a conversation to explore how parent coaching can help.
📞 Call me at (626) 755-4059 to schedule your free consultation.
FAQ: How Parent Coaching Works in a Therapy Setting
How is parent coaching different from traditional therapy?
As a therapist, I use parent coaching as an integrative approach—blending the insight and depth of therapy with the practical, hands-on strategies of coaching. Instead of focusing solely on your child’s behavior, we look at the relational patterns, nervous system states, and attachment needs driving that behavior. Parent coaching gives you science-backed tools to strengthen connection, increase co-regulation, and create a more peaceful home environment.
Is this therapy for me, my child, or both?
Unlike child therapy, which works directly with your child, parent coaching focuses on you—helping you become the primary agent of change in your family. Because you are your child’s safest and most powerful source of healing, we work together to shift the way you interact, respond, and connect so that your child naturally begins to regulate and thrive.
What kinds of challenges can parent coaching help with?
This approach is especially effective for parents of children who are:
- Neurodiverse (Autism, ADHD, gifted, highly sensitive).
- Struggling with emotional regulation and frequent meltdowns.
- Adopted or have experienced early trauma.
- Resistant to traditional parenting strategies like consequences and rewards.
If you’ve tried everything and nothing seems to work, parent coaching can help you understand your child through a brain-based lens and make changes that actually last.
How long does parent coaching take?
Every family is different. Some parents see big shifts in just a few sessions, while others choose to work with me longer to deepen their understanding and skills. My goal is to give you tools you can use for a lifetime—not keep you in therapy forever.
Can I do parent coaching alongside my child’s therapy?
Absolutely. In fact, parent coaching often enhances your child’s progress in therapy. Many children struggle to generalize what they learn in therapy to everyday life. When you, as the parent, have the tools to co-regulate, connect, and create felt safety, your child’s therapy is far more effective.
How do I get started?
I offer a free, one-hour phone consultation to see if parent coaching is the right fit for you. No pressure—just a chance to talk, ask questions, and explore how I can support your family.
📞 Call me at (626) 755-4059 to schedule your consultation.
My Motto: I help parents become the healer in the home.
What Others are Saying
" It has been a pleasure to connect with Abigail McCarrel. What a wonderful asset it is to a clinician to have someone they can refer to like Abigail. Her personality exudes warmth, professionalism, and dedication to her clients and to honing her craft. She has a wealth of experience, having worked with children for decades before transitioning to focusing primarily on the major agents of change in the family: the parents. It is an honor to get to refer parents of the children and adolescents for whom I conduct psychological testing to an experienced, skilled, and devoted clinician. I highly recommend reaching out to Abigail for parent coaching therapy, if you are looking for an empathetic, capable, and skilled care provider. "
Dr. Shannon Thomas
Psychologist, Inc.