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Attention or Connection?

Understanding Your Child’s Behavior: What If It’s Not Attention-Seeking?

Connection Over Correction: Rethinking Behavior with Online Parent Therapy

If you’re parenting a child with big, confusing, or disruptive behaviors, you’ve probably heard the phrase: "They’re just being attention-seeking."

But what if your child isn’t seeking attention?

What if they’re seeking connection?

As a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with over 30 years of experience supporting families raising children with neurodivergence, giftedness, ADHD, autism, and developmental trauma, I’ve seen firsthand how quickly parents can feel like they’re failing when traditional strategies don’t work.

I founded Welcome Home Family Therapy, a virtual practice offering online parent therapy in California, to help parents break out of those cycles. When we stop seeing behavior as a problem to fix and instead ask what need is trying to be expressed, we begin to transform our families from the inside out.

Behavior Is Communication, Not Defiance

As parents, it can be heartbreaking to watch our child spiral into meltdowns, shutdowns, or aggressive behaviors. You try everything: you stay calm, you set limits, you give space. And yet, the explosions continue. You start to feel defeated. Is it me? Is something wrong with my child?

You're not alone. And nothing is wrong with your child.

Children with complex emotional needs often don’t have the words to say, "I need help." So they show us through their behavior. When we label that behavior as bad or attention-seeking, we miss the chance to meet their deeper need for safety, co-regulation, and connection.

Online parent therapy in California gives you a structured, supportive way to understand the root of your child’s behavior. You’ll learn how to decode what they’re really trying to say and how to respond in ways that build trust and emotional safety.

My Journey as a Recovering Strict Parent

I used to think I had to be the strong one. That setting rules, enforcing consequences, and keeping my emotions in check was what made me a good parent. But over time—especially as I raised three twice-exceptional daughters—I learned that the strongest thing I could do was connect.

Connection doesn’t mean permissiveness. It means understanding. It means being willing to pause and say, "What’s really happening here? What does my child need right now that they don’t know how to ask for?"

That shift changed everything. Not just in my home, but in my work with families across California. And it’s the foundation of my approach to therapy for parenting today.

The Benefits of Online Parent Therapy in California

At Welcome Home Family Therapy, I offer online parent therapy in California so you can get support where you need it most—in your home, in real time. There’s no need to travel, find childcare, or disrupt your day. Just a quiet moment with a trusted professional who understands what it means to raise complex kids.

Online therapy makes it easier to:

  • Integrate therapeutic strategies into your daily routines

  • Practice new approaches in your actual parenting environment

  • Access flexible scheduling that works with your life

  • Stay consistent with support, even when life gets hectic

The Science Behind the Connection

My approach is grounded in the neuroscience of safety and connection. Drawing from interpersonal neurobiology, polyvagal theory, trauma-informed care, and cognitive-behavioral therapy, I help you:

  • Understand your child’s nervous system

  • Learn how to regulate your own emotional responses

  • Strengthen co-regulation strategies that build emotional resilience

When your child feels safe with you, they’re more likely to open up, calm down, and trust. That safety begins with how you show up.

Who I Work With

I specialize in parent family therapy in California for:

  • Parents of neurodivergent children (gifted, 2e, ADHD, autism)

  • Families with developmental trauma histories

  • Parents navigating explosive behaviors, shutdowns, or persistent disconnection

  • Parents who want to lead with empathy but don’t know how

Whether you co-parent well together or feel like you’re carrying it alone, this therapy gives you a space to feel supported, empowered, and heard.

What You Can Expect from Our Work Together

In online parent therapy, we don’t try to "fix" your child. Instead, we work on the relationship—because when that shifts, everything else begins to soften.

You will:

  • Develop personalized strategies based on your child’s unique neurobiology

  • Build confidence in your parenting choices

  • Learn how to respond to behaviors with connection instead of reactivity

  • Start to feel like a team again, not adversaries

Most importantly, you’ll stop feeling like you’re failing.

FAQs: Online Parent Therapy in California

What is parenting therapy, and how is it different from family therapy? Parenting therapy focuses specifically on helping you, the parent, navigate your child’s needs, behaviors, and emotions. While family therapy may involve the entire family, parenting therapy often begins with just the adults.

Can this work if my child doesn’t attend sessions? Absolutely. In fact, many of the families I work with start with parent-only sessions. Change often begins when parents receive the support and insight they need.

Do you only see families dealing with neurodivergence or trauma? No. While those are my specialties, I work with any parent feeling overwhelmed, confused, or disconnected from their child.

What are the benefits of online therapy for parenting? You can attend from home, where you’re parenting in real-time. No commute, no waiting rooms, and no added stress.

Do you accept insurance? I am a private-pay provider, which allows us to focus entirely on your family’s needs without restrictions. Superbills are available for out-of-network reimbursement.

How do I know if we’re a good fit? Let’s talk. I offer a free, hour-long phone consultation to explore your concerns and see if working together feels right. Call me at (626) 755-4059.

Abby McCarrel, a warm and experienced psychotherapist with long white hair and glasses, stands outdoors with her hand on her hip, surrounded by lush greenery. Her confident, compassionate presence reflects her work in online parenting therapy, helping parents deepen connection with their children through trauma-informed, brain-based support rooted in understanding and emotional safety.

My motto: I help parents become the healers in the home.


You Deserve Support: Contact Abby

We will have a brief screening phone call and if it feels right, we will schedule an hour-long, free phone consultation to see if we are a good match for therapy. This is my offering to you, at a time when you are struggling the most.

Book a free Discovery Call: here